WISDOM

We all need to live life mindfully, fully and lovingly. Give thought to HOW you live. Give thought to the people in your life. To your body and health. To the things you purchase. To how you use your time.

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Over 50 Artist Icon_Meet Susan Unterberg

Over 50 Artist Icon: Susan Unterberg

This is the 2nd in my series of Over 50 Ladies of Inspiration. Susan Unterberg and her sister inherited a foundation from their father. So, for the last 22 years, she has paid out a total of $5.5 MILLION (yes millions!) to support under-recognized female artists over age 40.

Now you may ask, "is it really necessary to provide this kind of support to female artists?" The answer is a resounding YES. Take a look at this fact: It was announced in July 2018 that the National Gallery in London acquired artwork by Artemisia Gentileschi ... THE FIRST TIME THE WORK OF A FEMALE ARTIST AS BEEN ACQUIRED BY THE GALLERY IN 27 YEARS! That doesn't seem possible, does it? But it's true.

So the philanthropy of Unterberg is critical. One of the artists, recently, that received a grant from Unterberg - at a much needed time when she was unable to pay even her rent - was Amy Sherald. She received the grant right before it was announced that she was selected to paint Michelle Obama for the National Portrait Gallery.

As an aside, on a recent trip to D.C., we were able to visit the National Portrait Gallery. As a teen, I had spent many weekends, staying with my grandmother who lived in Washington, and visiting the museums together. But the National Portrait Gallery was limited in its exhibits back then and we never even visited.

But going recently, I was blown away. The building is gorgeous and the exhibits vast and wonderful. The Presidential Hall was fascinating, not just seeing all the portraits, but they have included a vivid description of each President's terms, spelling out challenges and issues of the times. It makes you realize there is no such thing as "the good old days". Politics was always politics and issues, fights, and dissatisfaction with the state of affairs has always been a part of our history. 

So wrapping up, thank you to Susan Unterberg for supporting artists, like Amy Sherald and many others, helping to make it possible to give women a place in the National Portrait Gallery and beyond.


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How To Load Your Dishwasher

How To Load Your Dishwasher

What household hasn't battled over how to load the dishwasher. There are what I deem the "lazy" people that just throw stuff in and waste room. I mean, shouldn't every dishwash run be effectively organized and maximized. ;-) Then there are the people that put the silverware down instead of up. Or people that block the water from flowing throughout this wondrous machine by putting large things on the bottom that cover the water spraying around. And, then of course, there is the age old argument on whether you should "wash" your dishes BEFORE you put them in the dishwasher, i.e., rinse off all the food and nastiness.

But is there really a "right" way to load a dishwasher? I'll let you decide, but this article "This is the right way to load your dishwasher" succinctly covers the major points. One thing I DO know, I load the dishwasher perfectly.


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Finding Friends

Finding Friends

We all want and need friends, right? And let’s be clear: your age doesn’t matter.
 
As a certified Navy brat, I’ve done my fair share of being the new kid on the block. So it you’re finding it tough, here are a few hints:
 
1. I’ll tell you from experience that it becomes more difficult to find things geared to older adults (although this can vary depending on where you live). But beer cruises, bar hops, house parties, baby showers, beginning wine tasting classes (and in LA, fitness classes with body builders and budding actresses, yoga with naked pool parties, and beach volleyball) tend to be geared to people in their 20’s and 30’s. So get creative! Brainstorm and put together a list of possibilities. The meetup photography group, cooking classes at the local restaurant, NIA and other dance classes, religious and spiritual groups, networking groups, etc. Once you have your list, take on the challenge to work your way through the list while you look for that golden nugget in a treasure map. It’s there! Hint number ONE: get creative in figuring out where you can make connections.
 
2. In LA, I found it was tough. Very tough. I’d go to events and classes and, invariably, I’d think “Why am I the only person over 40 in here? There must be other people in my age range that want to do things?!” Lots of things might contribute to this, such as too much traffic and so many people that it’s easy to feel lonely. But, somewhere there ARE other people like you that want to connect. Here’s a great example: When Dale Pollekoff found it difficult making friends after she moved from Washington, D.C. to LA, she started a meetup group “Finding Female Friends past Fifty”. As of today the group has 1,370 members!!! That’s a LOT of women that probably felt like I did. So hint TWO: keep searching … they’re out there somewhere.
 
3. A recent New York Times article, "Finding Female Friends Over 50 Can Be Hard. These Women Figured It Out," points out “studies have concluded that friendships are vital to a person’s well-being, and this is especially true for older women.” If you’re having a hard time finding friends, you might decide that it’s not really that important, that you can manage on your own. But having friends IS very important in avoiding loneliness and depression. That’s why HINT number THREE is: don’t fall into the trap of giving up and not finding friends.
 
4. A couple of times I’ve worked at places or lived in places where I didn’t “belong”. A wonderful book called “Women Who Run With The Wolves” by Clarissa Pinkola Estes relates this to the Ugly Duckling story. In the end, the duckling wasn’t ugly at all; he was a beautiful swan that had simply been in the “wrong pond”. In those kinds of situations, it’s amazing how our self-talk can convince us that there is something wrong with ourselves. Hint number FOUR: Before you beat yourself up, consider that you might be in the wrong pond. If you are, start taking baby steps to change your situation and start searching for YOUR pond.
 
5. Lastly, remember that people come and go; circumstances change; people change. When we first moved to Tucson, we met a couple that we instantly loved and we vowed to be friends forever. And just as instantly they disappeared … without even a word to us. When “life” happens, it can take a while to adjust and replace. So, try to not put yourself in that position. A circle of friends that you can trust will prove golden over time. And if one of your circle falls through, you’ll have the rest of the circle to rely on. Hint FIVE: Keep building your circle of friends. Like the old song, “make new friends, but keep the old.”



 
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Over 50 Accidental Style Icon

Over 50 Accidental Style Icon:
Linda Rodin

I know I've personally gone through many iterations of "personal style". As I've gotten older, I've have more difficulty finding the "look" that fits my current lifestyle. It was easier when I was young and in a corporate environment - but now there are NO parameters ... ONLY the one's I create. I find this article inspirational -- not because I could EVER get away with dressy as funky as Linda Rodin, but because she's comfortable in her own skin. So enjoy the READ!





Posted in Ladies of Inspiration, Personal Style | View Post
The Big Mac vs Tea Challenge

The Big Mac vs. Tea Challenge

Have you ever participated in a McDonald’s Big Mac eating contest. I’m guessing most of you will say “no”. Well neither have I, but two people I know have (who will remain nameless to protect the innocent). Here's how it went down: Nameless son-in-law baits nameless father-in-law into a Mac eating contest under one condition: that the nameless father-in-law agrees to drink a cup of tea. While this part of the challenge seems innocuous to the casual observer, it this case, said recipient of the tea HATES tea. Sorry, ABHORS tea. 
 
Lessons learned from this challenge:
 
The dangers:
Challenges like this make you look like crazy people 
Your at risk of choking
Realizing how calm family members are when you’re choking
 
The rewards:
Uncontrollable laughter
Entertaining other tables at McDonalds
Receiving charity from strangers (notice the young man who brings extra napkins to our table)
 
Let the games begin!





 
Posted in Living My Life | View Post
Bing Cherries and Chinese Exclusion Act

Bing Cherries Named After Chinese Immigrant 

Now You Know ... how names of things and colloquialisms
come about can be interesting and, even, fascinating


The Bing Cherry

You've probably never wondered what the "Bing" in "Bing Cherries" means. As it turns out, a Chinese immigrant named Ah Bing helped cultivate the Bing variety of cherries when he worked on a farm in Oregon.

Also interesting, Ah Bing lived in an era of persecution and racism against the Chinese. Like immigrants today, the Chinese worked at lower wages as laborers, but were derided for hurting American wages and stealing jobs. Hence, as historian Erika Lee writes, "arguments in support of Chinese exclusion arose." Sound familiar?

So, in 1882, the government passed the Chinese Exclusion Act, barring Chinese laborers from entering the U.S. for decades. And, inciting violence against the Chinese, including driving them out of town and burning their homes. 

While Ah Bing was protected by his employer, he eventually left for a visit to his homeland. It is believed that, due to the Exclusion Act, he was not allowed re-entry to the U.S. Yet, despite being barred and persecuted, unknowingly, his name is immortalized on every bag of Bing Cherries sitting in grocery stores!

To read more details of this story: The Tragic Roots of America's Favorite Cherries



Posted in Interesting Stuff | View Post
My friend Larry passed after 10 year battle with Parkinsons

My Friend Larry Passed Away From Parkinson's Disease

This is a tribute to my friend Larry and a thank you to social media for making our continued friendship possible. I know, that sounds crazy, but I'll explain why. And, you can read my favorite Larry story and why I will miss my friend who waged a valiant battle against Parkinson's Disease. My condolences to his family as Larry's beautiful energy rejoins the earth. Here's my tribute: 

 

A lot of people these days bash Facebook, particularly generations that came after us baby boomers. They take Facebook and social media for granted because they've ALWAYS had the ability to stay connected with childhood, high school, college and other friends to come, so it doesn't seem like anything special. But for my generation, once you left or moved from a school or a town or a job, the people that were in your life were usually out of your life. The only ways to stay in touch were by letter - and even back then, most people didn't write letters - or by phone, which was costly. 

Then along came Facebook. Now, I have many friends and past co-workers, including Larry, with whom I have reconnected. Back in the 80's, I worked on-site for my client, a group that maintained the technical manuals on the U.S. submarine fleet. Larry was my buddy in the office. My favorite Larry story is the time I came back from a break, walked into the office, said hello to Larry and he laughed in my face. I asked what was so funny and he told me to go to the restroom and look in the mirror. Back then, there was a lipstick called "chameleon" that looked like a green colored chapstick, but then turned red when applied. Apparently, when I apply a chapstick type of substance, I'm not careful! So, when I looked into the mirror, RED was smeared all "outside the lines" of my lips. I looked like a six year old that had gotten hold of mom's lipstick! 

I loved that Larry had laughed in my face. A lot of people wouldn't have said anything out of embarrassment and I would have been walking around looking ridiculous. But he was truly my friend and friends can laugh at you like that. Friends also tell friends when they have lipstick all over their face!

The best part of this story is that because Larry was SUCH a good person and, as they say of New Englanders, "the salt of the earth", I wanted to help him find someone special in life ... but it had to be someone who was worthy of this great guy. And I knew the perfect person, one of my sorority sisters, Theresa. I arranged the introduction, made Larry PROMISE to call her and, well, the rest is history. The magic happened and, to my great delight, they ended up getting married and having a family. 

Eventually, I moved away from northern Virginia and we lost touch. But then, a few years back, Larry and I reconnected on Facebook. Though I never physically saw Larry again, he became my friend again because of Facebook. For that, I am truly grateful. So over the years, he'd "like" all my political rantings, I asked him questions about his illness and what it was like and how he lived his days with it, he'd send funny videos or beautiful photos that touched him via messenger. I loved that I could be frank with him and ask questions about his disease. I know his last few years were tough and frustrating and limiting. Yet, while he probably experienced times of being down or frustrated by his disease, I admired watching how his kind and positive spirit came out in all of his musings. I admired how he didn't just feel sorry for himself, but still saw life as wonderful and worthwhile.

It was Theresa that sent me the message, in such a beautiful way, that Larry had "won" his battle with Parkinson's on March 21st, 2018. Even though our friendship had become virtual, the connection was real and I am deeply affected and sad that he is no longer with us. I am also sad for his family and beautiful Theresa - who also happens to be a pretty magnificent person that has spent much of her life caring for others. I know this loss will leave a huge hole in their lives and hearts, but one filled with wonderful memories. And I know, that I will truly miss my friend, Larry. 
 

Posted in Living My Life | View Post
Every Year Make One Big Change

The Join of Making One Big Change Every New Year 


Last year, after following Coach.me for at least 2 or 3 years, I took the plunge and joined the VIP Program. And now I am super stoked because this month they're focused on turning your New Year Resolution into ONE BIG CHANGE. In other words, affecting one giant, life-changing goal. For me, my one big change is to lead a less stressful, overwhelmed life. What is yours?

So, if you think some guidance can help you actually ACHIEVE your big change, then check out this program. It takes place everyday, but you can literally participate when you have the time and not participate when you don't because all the exercises are self-contained modules. The program has already helped me and I expect over time it will help me even more!

If you do decide to give it a go, be sure to enter the code BIGCHANGEVIP to get $100 of freebies. (Dang... I didn't get all those freebies when I signed up!) Sign up here.

Disclosure: I am not associated with Coach.me in any way, nor do I benefit from your signing up. I just love this and want to share!
Coach.me VIP Program

For extra credit: Here's an article by Tony (the CEO of Coach.me) that explains just what goes into making your BIG CHANGE happen. Read it here ... good reading!


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